Hunger/Fulfillment

Mid-January, and there are still remnants of Christmas candy around the house!  Even though a few morsels remain, the peanut brittle, fruitcake, delights from a Harry & David gift box, and a myriad of chocolate confections no longer clutter the kitchen counter. I was even craving a peanut cluster yesterday… Well, not quite that strong, but I would have eaten one if it was on the counter.

Amidst this type of abundance from the holidays, I came across a verse of Scripture-

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they will be filled.” Matthew 5:6 NIV

I paused when I pulled this verse from a promise box that sits next to my bathroom sink.

Some questions immediately came to mind that morning.  “On a scale from 1 to 10, how hungry are you for righteousness?” “By the way, do you even have a hunger for a holy life?”

Honestly, when I thought about my hunger for “righteousness” on a 10- point scale, that morning I was at a 3.

I made sure I looked up some key words in this verse to mine out the true meaning behind what was written. Happy is a person who craves to live a virtuous, pure life -- a life that is full of integrity, in one’s thoughts and actions. Why?  Because, a person will be satisfied and fulfilled when his/her desire for righteousness is fervent.

Maybe you have noticed that when your hunger for righteousness is low, other desires begin to nudge your focus from True North.  You know -- the appetites for ambition, feeling significance or importance, the desire for influence, for fame, for money, or for someone to hear your point of view, to lust, etc…

“God, I don’t have a hunger for you.  Why is that?” The transparent confession was coupled with the question, “Why?” And, one step further,  “How do I get this hunger? ”Sometimes it is definitely there, but that day…hmm…, well, not so much.

“Ask Me for it.”

Yes, I think that is what I heard. Pragmatically speaking, I don’t want to raise a question without offering answers. More Bible reading, prayer, or even solitude won’t replace vulnerably approaching God and humbly requesting that He give you something He already wants to give.

So, I asked Him. I’ll keep on asking!

Satisfied (not a complacent kind, but a rich fulfilled kind).  I can’t explain it, but the hunger is there, and the hunger isn’t from me – hunger like that isn’t natural.

Blessed or Cursed?

Christmas is over and people are returning to stores, exchanging gifts or taking advantage of after- Christmas sales. Dads and moms are turning their focus to packing up the tree, lights, wrapping paper, and tinsel for next year before the New Year’s regular pace resumes. What an incredible time of the year to savor moments with family and loved ones we hold dear to our hearts!

At the turn of a New Year, I find myself thinking about what the twelve months ahead hold and all that I want to accomplish. While pondering where I am in life and experiences of the past, a thought surfaces: “Aren’t the times we think are the most cursed, truly the most blessed?”

Think about it…

That’s what I’ve been doing today, and that thought comes back to me…repeatedly.

I still remember being fresh out of college, with absolutely no experience one would deem necessary for youth ministry. Full-time ministry, in a downtown church in Canton, OH, was a struggle after leaving the close friendships of college life. I learned to be faithful to what I sensed God wanted me to do, though much of the time it felt very unpopular. When you lead in any endeavor, it can be challenging to filter out the brashest voices of disapproval. And for the next two years, I prayed for God to help me to love the battle. But when I announced my resignation after two years to pursue a ministerial education, it amazed me that the youth I served showed brokenness at my parting.  Could I have been a blessing amidst days that I thought and felt were an absolute curse in my life? Nothing against some of the great people I was serving and with whom I served! My eyes failed me in seeing what God was accomplishing amidst the personal pain of dealing with the pressures of youth ministry.

Later, my pilgrimage led me into international missions where I served in Mexico for a few years as a single missionary. It was faith-forming to trust in Biblical promises that I tried to apply to my life, when I couldn’t figure out why an “all powerful” God wouldn’t see my need for close companionship. I was so thankful for a buddy who gave me a calling card to make the thousand plus miles disappear, at least a little, when I called my parents or other close friends. At the time, it was a trying existence as I struggled to communicate in Spanish, with ease, from my heart. Opportunities for deep relationships that could lead to a marriage were unavailable. The loneliness of those years, when I wasn’t able to talk to people in my heart language, wasn’t what I’d describe as healthy. The situation left me void of sensing blessings that were obvious. But, in our weakness, God is strong! I’m still in touch with many of the youth I served in that church in Irapuato, a city of central Mexico, and it still thrives as a place where lives are encouraged and transformed. Since I experienced a prolonged singleness, it gave me backbone for waiting in other seasons of my life. Humiliating experiences outside of my own comfort zone have provided backbone to endure through subsequent challenges. So, was all that I experienced a curse or a blessing?

At present, I’m a stay at home, full-time father. Friends with career success have told me that I’m in a privileged position. Most would consider a season of life without employment that shoulders the bulk of the bills in a household, a curse. The obvious blessing is that my wife has a job that cares for the financial obligations. We’ve learned to live at a much simpler level and practice thriftiness. We plan to invest and give at higher levels when greater employment opportunity comes along. Paramount in all of this -- I’m sensing I TRULY am blessed. I’m beginning to give up my angst about professional development and surrender fretting about the unemployment to God. After all, I’ve heard that He works for my good, and HE makes even what you or I might consider to be a curse, an incredible blessing. Looking forward to 2012!

Convinced -- that if I prevail, in faith, through the seemingly unfortunate experiences of life, even greater benefits await me on the other side. The greater the misfortune is felt, the greater the chance that perseverance in faith can turn the season into unimaginable blessings.

Do you feel cursed? It may be the door to your greatest blessing.

Romans 8:28  “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

Merry Christmas

Dear Family and Friends,

2011’s end is already in sight!  They say, “Time flies when you are having fun.” We must be having funJ! God’s blessings have been evident throughout the past year.

Gwyneth is two. Her words and verbal cues are becoming clearer to us each day as her vocabulary rapidly grows. She’s a “ go- getter,” and has a way of exasperating Jace in her forceful and sweet manner. Her feet don’t reach the pedals of our tricycle yet, but Jace made sure she doesn’t miss out on an occasional ride. She already tries to be caregiver for her big brother and it is a blessing to see her personality bloom on a daily basis. 
                                         

Jace consumes any new book he can get his hands on. By that, I mean, he has his parents read the book to him. He’s been riding a bike with training wheels, having fun with his train table, and learning how to express his emotions. Jace has a great ear for music, noted by his ability to sing on key and his concentration on the instrument that is being played in a song. He’s an intelligent little boy who is a joy to watch mature and flourish.

Sarah has recently completed course work for a certification in acupuncture. She knows that the therapeutic results for animals are significant, but human friends and family have reaped benefits as well!  We are so thankful for the way that her job has provided for the family and we are still able to have significant family time each week. The kids erupt with excitement when she is at home, and she still gets tagged to read by both kids over dad when she is home.

John continues to be a stay at home dad. He worked part-time as a waiter for The Fort Grille through six months of the year and was grateful for the hours he was able to work when Sarah was at home. He continues to send resumes and serve at Harvest Church. We pray that in God’s time he will find a place of employment to flourish, grow, and provide. When he interviews he is up against hundreds of others in the same position. He needs your prayers for God to guide him to resources and experiences for his own personal development until the next major transition into full-time employment.

We’ve been blessed with being able to see family throughout the year. Sarah’s sister, Hannah, took pictures of our family after Thanksgiving. Some of the shots you are looking at on this blog are her handiwork. We apologize for the grainy pictures (Hannah didn’t take thoseJ) since our camera was set incorrectly at the time. But, you can see that we enjoyed time with Grandpa (Boo) and Grandma Lee, as well as Grandma Packard.

This update comes to you in hopes that you have a BLESSED Christmas season! Blessings to you!

John, Sarah, Jace,  Gwyneth

(for more pics scroll down)

 "For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. " Isaiah 9:6 NIV

Grandpa Lee ("Boo") with Gwyneth

Grandma Lee with Jace

Grandma Packard with, you guessed it:).

Gwyneth was dedicated to the Lord in March of this year at our church.

Best buds on a walk at a park near our home.

It was a blessing to take a vacation this past year. This was a pirate cruise that we all enjoyed.

Halloween 2011